Mom, Dad, We Have To Talk

In a new survey, seven out of 10 straight Americans say they know boys who like to kiss boys -- or girls who like to watch college football with other girls.

"If seven out of 10 heterosexuals know someone who is GLBT, then many gays and lesbians are making their identity apparent as a natural part of their lives -- just like their age, height, hair color, or personality," said Mark Shields, director of the Human Rights Campaign's National Coming Out Project.

"For most people, coming out or opening up to someone starts with a conversation. And for those interested in fostering strong, deep relationships with their friends and family, living openly often allows for closer relationships with the people they care about most."

The same survey shows that 83 percent of gay people consider themselves "out of the closet." The remaining 17 percent are either congressmen or the subject of "South Park" scorn. ("I'll sue you in England!) Ninety-two percent of gay people say they are out to close friends; 78 percent have had "the talk" with their parents.

Let's break this down ...

1. Three in 10 straight Americans say they do not know a gay person.

2. Almost two in 10 gay people say they are not out to their parents.

3. Which leads us to this conclusion: If you are a straight American and do not know a single gay person, guess what? Your child is queer. On top of that, your child trusts his/her/its best friends more than they do you. You must be so proud.