Wednesday, October 05, 2005

We Shall Name Him Damien

Surely, the End Times are upon us. Tommy Tooth and The Girl Who Is Taller Than Him are with child, according to People magazine.

Tom Cruise and his fiance, actress Katie Holmes, are expecting a baby six months into a whirlwind romance that has turned the once intensely private Cruise into a giddy and very public lover.

News of the pregnancy was first reported by People magazine on Wednesday. A statement from Cruise's publicist, his sister Lee Anne DeVette, added: "Tom and Katie are very excited, and the entire family is very excited." Holmes, she said, "has never felt better."

Translation: "Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast; for it is the number of a man; and his number is 666." -- The Book of Revelation Chapter 13, Verse 18

Now the burning question: Who held this?


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